The Downward Spiral

I've got this thing and it's fucking golden and...uh... uh...I'm just not giving it up for fucking nothing. I'm not gonna do it.
- IL Gov. Rod Blagojevich.

Evidently, the economy is SO bad, that even the governor is worried about stockpiling cash for himself and his harpy, shrew wife. Solid. I suspect we're all so beaten down, that news like this barely elicits more than an indifferent shrug from even the most optimistic among us.

Veteran Scrabble Players Will Recognize The "OSTRICH" Option

From The "DUH" File

Really? Somebody had to actually shoot this and upload it. We have hit the techno-cultural tipping point: Too much time on our hands combined with too many easy ways to disseminate information we already have.

Check back soon for my "how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich" masterpiece.

1) Preach On, Kid. 2) Way To Go, Joe.

Actually, That IS A Roll Of Quarters In My Pocket...

Someone please steal this sign for me.

Seems Pretty Transparent To Me

"Hello, America? Um...yeah. On second thought, we're NOT gonna do what we said we were going to do with your money. Namely, give you the slightest clue where it's going."

Looks like the government is still treating our money like a big bowl of jelly beans.

Show Me Your OH-bama Face!

Looks like people celebrated the Obama Presidency by gettin' all up in each other's biz-nazz. (Feel free to add "Obama" to your favorite sexual euphemism, and spread the wealth", as it were.)

Bust A Bandwith Cap In Your Ass

Pretty soon, your porn is gonna download faster than you can.

At Long Last: Forty-Four

We've all been witness to history tonight; an extraordinary moment for our brothers and sisters. The racial and cultural divisions in our nation's electorate have been diminished as Barack Obama becomes the first half-white President of the United States.

Wassup, Indeed.

In a culture of premature, forced nostalgia, I'm actually happy to see these guys again: