Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Deja View

This is badass. And you knew it had to happen sooner or later. Now, if it could just replicate natural light...

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Booba Fete

You're welcome, nerds.
Hot Chicks With Stormtroopers.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Race To The Right

I have a fair number of friends with whom I disagree on social issues and matters of policy. My parents are post-9/11 Republicans, which has essentially removed any healthy discourse from the holidays. (None of us want Thanksgiving dinner marred by a shouting match and I love my parents). No one on either side of the aisle has cornered the market on truth and the public discourse has been ratcheted to a fever pitch by fringe elements that are heavy on heart, but light on head. Fittingly, the elephant in the room is still race, which plays a much bigger role in the proceedings than most people are comfortable admitting.

-You didn't get mad when the Supreme Court stopped a legal recount and appointed a President.
-You didn't get mad when Cheney allowed Energy company officials to dictate energy policy.
-You didn't get mad when a covert CIA operative got outed.
-You didn't get mad when the Patriot Act got passed.
-You didn't get mad when we circumvented Congressional approval to invade a country that had not threatened us.
-You didn't get mad when we spent over 600 billion(and counting) on said war.
-You didn't get mad when over 10 billion dollars just disappeared in Iraq.
-You didn't get mad when you found out we were torturing people.
-You didn't get mad when the government was illegally wiretapping Americans.
-You didn't get mad when we didn't catch Bin Laden.
-You didn't get mad when you saw the horrible conditions at Walter Reed.
-You didn't get mad when we let a major US city, New Orleans, drown.
-You didn't get mad when we gave a 900 billion tax break to the rich.
-You didn't get mad when the deficit hit the trillion dollar mark.
-You didn't get mad when the housing industry collapsed because Wall Street fought even the slightest oversight whatsoever.

You finally got mad when the government decided that Americans deserved the right to see a doctor if they are sick.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Palin Rider

It must suck when you have to "energize your base" with someone you've already publicly derided. Leave John McCain some dignity, for god's sake. His time in Vietnam must have been less torture than this. (I am digging her "Harley chick" getup, though.)

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Down Time

We'll always fear what we don't understand and there is too much of both in present-day America. Looking ahead to the future of employment, conservative columnist/ TV pundit Reihan Salam has a fantastic piece in this month's Time magazine that manages to be oddly comforting in its vision of a wholly rebooted workplace, despite being burdened with so much uncertainty.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Zed's Dead, Baby

June 23rd. That's my birthday. For the record. In case you wanted to get me something.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Ubermensch



The fact that Christian conservatives statistically favor the theory of intelligent design over evolution is freshly ironic, since a new study suggests that conservatism is the more evolutionarily traditional path. Reaching the conclusion that intelligence is higher in people who exhibit tendencies that are "novel" with respect to evolution, liberals, atheists, night-owls, and monogamous men all hit the top of the IQ chart. The study will no doubt be derided by some as "ivory tower elitism", as it clearly has flaws. Show me a liberal dude who parties all night and rejects the concept of an afterlife, and I doubt I'll be looking at a one-woman man.

Friday, February 12, 2010

White Power



Congress is on its third day of recess because of blizzard conditions in DC, delaying work on a federal "jobs" bill. (Let's hope that legislation doesn't involve any snowplow unions.) For anyone who still believes in the patriotic fortitude of our elected officials, keep dreaming. If our nation can't even handle a naturally-occurring weather phenomenon, it doesn't give me much hope for the bigger stuff. Sadly, the irony of the mid-atlantic being buried under feet of snow, while the Winter Olympics in Vancouver remain bone-dry is lost on the climate-change deniers. More shocking is when the residents of these states remain shocked at the crippling power of winter. It happens every year, people. How can 25% of the snow plows in the DC/Baltimore area be broken when we all own calendars that are pretty good indicators of when we'll need to gas them up? If Phoenix got a foot of snow, I could understand everyone keeping one eye peeled for a litany of biblical plagues. Sure, this winter is a bit of an anomaly but otherwise, there aren't a lot of surprises if you live east of the Mississippi. It's gonna get deep.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Aural Fixation

Hurtling through time and space with a handful of songs that you must find and download, if only to make your tastes seem more impressively broad.

Steely Dan, Glamour Profession
Bruce Cockburn, Lovers In A Dangerous Time
Roxy Music, More Than This
Thievery Corporation, The Glass Bead Game
Brian Eno & Harold Budd, Late October
Gojira, Ocean Planet
Failure, Pillowhead
Daysleepers, Release The Kraken

Friday, February 5, 2010

Double-C 4



Religious fundamentalism is like a late-night infomercial: appealing to people who are groggy with lack of sleep, angry at the state of their life, and convinced that some useless gadget will make it better. In the case of Al-Qaida,it seems that gadget might be boobs. Recent intelligence chatter gathered by the United States and Britain's MI-5 indicates that Al-Qaida is certain to launch another attack on US soil in 2010; more specifically, that radical Muslim doctors trained in the UK have returned to their respective countries to fit teen female suicide bombers with explosive breast implants. In what counts for suffrage in the Middle East, it seems detonating yourself into oblivion is no longer a man's game. Given the inveterate horndogs that men are, it may prove to be terrorism's master stroke to turn our own vices against us. (I doubt American men would notice a sudden influx of Pakistani hookers.) Of all the weird things women scream during sex, "death to the infidels" probably isn't even in the top ten. In the interest of gender equality, similar surgery has been performed on male suicide bombers. In their cases, the explosives are most frequently inserted into the buttocks. With all due respect to Taco Bell, if your last living act is blowing your ass out, you've earned your share of virgins.