Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Lazy Eye Of The Beholder

A new study from Helsinki says that women are physically getting hotter. With all due respect to my Finnish friends, I've seen too much evidence to the contrary. Anytime you're in a summertime crowd- amusement park, state fair, pro-life rally- play a little game with yourself and make a mental tally of the number of attractive people you pass. You'll be able to count them on the one hand of an unlucky shop teacher. For an avid people-watcher like myself, a tourist trap like Chicago's Navy Pier is ground zero for the freak show. My girl and I were there a few weeks ago, showing the sights to a friend of hers who was in from Seattle. While they were preoccupied with chatting, I had extra time to play the game. After passing hundreds of people and not having a single hit on the ol' hot-o-meter, I began to get anxious and angry. Good looking people put all of us in a better mood; they reaffirm the boundaries of the human lottery. And I don't have unattainable standards of beauty by any means (and it IS the midwest) but I got the sinking feeling that the results of the Helsinki study were confined to the babes of the Baltic Sea. And my girlfriend. And her friend.

No comments: